Nebraska bricks

And I grew up
on alcoholic evenings and slow jazz music to keep my heart
beating
because after all that happens in a dissolving family
the need for a song to sing me to sleep still rings true
and I always knew that there wasn't glue strong enough to sew
these roots together
and now that I've wasted too many years
and I've lost track of where I started
I have to dream at night of who I was and why after twenty years
of marriage
I am what is left and I'd like to go back now
and make myself up because I'd be a brick so I wouldn't feel
and I'd lift myself up and I'd throw myself at this house
to break windows and smash walls